A little on the Tog side....

My name is Kara Clark, I am 34 years old and I live in Los Angeles, CA. I am the owner and full time photographer of Kara Elizabeth Photography.  In addition to being a photographer, I am a mom of 4 lovely children,  Ethan, Allison, Kaylee and Emily, with whom I am beyond blessed, and my wonderful, supportive, handsome husband, Tristan.

Of course photography is a big part of my life but I also have many other interests. I love being outdoors, camping  at the beach, hiking and running.  I also love traveling, spending time with my family, and getting to appreciate the little things in life. I am a coffee addict,  I will admit, I need it to get through my day, and I am OK with that!  I love to laugh, and I love to make memories through experiences. I am a firm believer that the glass is always half full,  and life is what we make it. I also believe that working hard, will get you many places in life, and seizing every opportunity that you have is the secret to success.

I always had an interest in photography, I loved looking at images and art. I did not pick up my first camera until I was in my freshman year of college, in 1997.  I was an Art Major at Calvin College, in Grand Rapids, Michigan. I was very interested in photography so I decided that I would pursue Graphic design, with a photography minor.  I completely owe my introduction to photography and film to my Photography professor, Jennifer Steensma-Hoag. She introduced me to film photography,  the style, the skill and basics which I have based my photography career off of today.  I was taught under her instruction in the dark room where I lived to work and spend so many hours, learning, helping, and teaching other students as well! But even though I loved Photography, and graduated with my major in Photography, there was still a journey that had to be taken to be where I am today.

When I graduated college, I loved photography and did some shoots on the side with other jobs.  It was always a hobby, a passion but not a career. The turning point for me, came from a place of desperation. Honestly. I was going through a very difficult divorce, I was at a very low point in my life. I was working day in and day out.. not seeing my kids very often and this was weighing down on my heart and I could see the absence of me as a mother in my children's life. I was doing everything possible to support my kids in such a hard time, but they were missing the most important thing, ME. We were missing important moments. We were missing out on the little things together.  At the time I was working as a teacher, one of my other passions, and I was raising other people's kids at my day job while mine were lonely for their mom. I had a breaking point. A moment where I realized I had to make a change, doing something I loved, while still being available to my children, as their mom. I took a huge risk, and decided I was going to quit my job and do photography full time. It was a crazy risk. I could not have done it if my mom and dad did not help me and give me an avenue to pursue this career. 

 From that moment, I have grown a business while seeing every moment of my children's lives.. which are so quickly passing by. It has not been easy. Money has been tight, I have had many late nights, lots of planning, hard work and building a business. But I have NOT looked back since. I have based my career, on honesty, hard work, and always being willing to learn, take criticism and blood sweat and tears. I am beyond fortunate to be doing something I love, and to have others support me in this journey and believe in what I do and to see my work as Art, and a form of expression.

In photography, I love doing portraits. I love finding that inner beauty. That spark, that lovely moment where my subject feels lovely,  is able to let go and  is able to express and show the true reality of who they are. 

I love photographing children, they are innocent, and often times the most uninhibited  behind a camera. There is something about their raw beauty and the way they see the world. So fresh, honest sweet  and innocent.  In a world where we are exposed to see and hear so much hurt, and sadness.. the way a child sees things, it is like being able to relive the world in a new and fresh way.. untouched and pure. Some of the children in my images, are family, my niece is definitely a muse for me, since she was born she is use to Auntie with the camera. Her expressions, and joy for life are just wonderful to capture! She captivates me.  There is something very memorable about capturing your own family as well. Often, I find myself falling in love with the images of my family and kids, and children, because there are so many raw emotions connected to the individuals, or memories of the moment which come rushing back with an image.  It is like hearing a song, an image takes you back to the moment itself, I love that about photography.

I like both color, Black and White and Sepia colored images.  I really feel that each image has its own personality. Whether it be soft and gentle with color, or striking and emotional with black and white or sepia. It really depends on each image as to how I edit them, that I feel is part of the artistic style as well.

As far as gear, I shoot with a Nikon D7000, I mostly use my 24-70mm 2.8 lens or the 50mm 1.8 lens.  My dream camera is the Nikon D600 which I am hoping will be in my gear bag soon!

My deepest passion in life is photography. I only hope that my business will continue to grow and flourish. I would love to be doing more dance and creative photography, possible traveling while doing photography for certain venues. I love creative and artistic photography and I would love to be a part of collaborations with other photographers. I feel that I learn so much from others, while working together and learning from each other. I also want to continue my mentoring for beginning photographers, possibly work with high school students, or college students by providing internships and teaching them, from a mentoring perspective!

If I could choose one word that I would like others to  feel when they see my photography work, it would be creative. I would hope others would see life and creativity in my subjects, how they are captured, and that my work would continue to change in this way, to show life and my love for the art of photography.

Is it really worth Posting?

This post, you might not like it. You might not agree. You might be irritated by it. You might stop reading right now. I hope that you don't because I feel like it offers a lot of insight, and a hot topic for discussion.

I have to be honest with you, some of this stuff I read on Facebook, is just TMI! (Too Much Information)!  I can handle the updates, the kids photos, the what I ate for breakfast photos, the I am going to the Dr, or having a hard time etc, pray for me posts. I am actually pretty tolerable! So its not the basic updates that drive me nuts!

But I have to say I get personally, down right irritated with people who complain about EVERY detail of their lives! It is like they create drama, to have drama, so they can post about drama on their Facebook page!!!!!!!

Not only are people posting about personal drama, they are posting drama that their kids are facing, have you thought about how the internet is going to affect not only your future, but also your kids? Something to think about.  When your child's name is Googled are they  going to find the blog articles you wrote about the day they were potty trained? Are colleagues and friends going to read about their first day of kinder, their first boyfriend or girlfriend? In a day and age where we really haven't lived past this extent of technology, a lot of these questions go unanswered. We are like the trial drug, being sent out by the healthcare system that is just for tests? How will they change it in the future? What parts of technology will come back to haunt us? Or haunt your kids? Besides writings and posts, what about images?

What about your own personal business? How are you posts from your personal profile affecting your business, or your reputation? Sometimes we don't stop to think about what we are posting, because we think it is personal, or private.

I personally have taken a stand against posting negative posts. I think that as a community, a virtual one, we should take a stand against this and make the internet a more positive place for the world we are in today and the world  that we are creating for the future!

I am in no way saying that my life is perfect. IT is FAR from perfect. But every time I post, I think about what are others going to think when they read this? How is this going to affect my community, what is the purpose of this post?

When I went through my divorce, I was forced to filter EVERYTHING. For legal reasons, and for personal reasons. I realized how much damage I was doing with saying negative things. It had a downward spiral reaction, not only on myself, but on my children and my environment.

I knew something had to change.

I know that when I read certain posts, on the negativity, the one's that elude to,  "I want to quit, the I am done, the My life is over or the hate posts", I am absolutely turned off. We all have a personal circle of people that we trust, and love. Sometimes that is only one person, But we need to use them. Use them as a filter, a wall to bounce information off, so we can make the most sound choices in posting what is right and what is necessary.

I know that someday, my kids will outlive me. They will search back through my photography work, my Facebook comments, my magazine articles, and my blog posts. I want to make sure that I leave a legacy that they can be proud of, one that will fill them with good memories, and laughter and moments we shared. I also hope that it might leave a glimmer to a life that was lived, fully, happily and in a positive way to those who surrounded me!

You lost me at Blended....

The Blended Family Mom Tog -  A pretty loaded title if you ask me. Some of you might be saying, "you lost me at blended", others of you might be saying, "what's a tog?" No they are not typos,  they are not some sort of joke, they actually have meaning. 

In searching for a title for my blog, I wanted to combine all parts of who I am now.  I wanted a phrase that could somehow, if even humanly possible, encapsulate who I am and what I do.

I am going to start backwards, I am a lefty so this comes natural to me! A tog.. in short is a photographer. That is what I do, It is what I am, what I live and breathe. Photography. Plus it rhymes nicely with the rest of the phrase! :-)

I realize blended, is somewhat of a loaded term. Its a nice way of saying two families, from a separate origination, come together through marriage. Or if you would like a translation, two people who have gone through a divorce, find love again, and remarry, therefore creating a new family, bringing their own children together, and in essence, creating a new family unit. 

When I thought about blended, I decided a proper place to start would be to look up the definition :"Blended: to mix smoothly and inseparably together" WOW!  I was taken back by this and actually pretty surprised how casually this word is used when talking about new families coming together through marriage!! 

If you are a part of or know anyone who is a blended family, this definition seems so far from the truth. I can honestly say, at this point we are pretty far from blended, I guess that is a term we will be working towards, but the part I don't agree with is the smoothly. There is nothing smooth about this transition, there is nothing easy, natural or inseparable about it!

If you haven't experienced this, or been close to someone who has, let me just give you a quick overview of what its like. 

Imagine with me for just a moment, yes its time to get that Brady Bunch Tune in your head.. 
'There's a story of a lovely lady," wait stop, there is nothing lovely about this. We are all so eager to look at media when it comes to blended families. Just like the Brady Bunch. Why is that? Did we honestly think they had it all together? Where were the parents Ex's? OK well as you can see, there was no sense of reality going on for the Brady Bunch.

But lets take a reality check. Step away from the perfect TV family and look at my situation. 

There is a mother, in this case, me who has 2 lovely kids, 11 and 9. They are my flesh and blood, my sweat and tears. In a very honest world, there is nothing like your own kids, I am not saying this to be mean or anything, but it is just simply the truth and if you do not acknowledge this, you are lying to yourself.  

There is also a father, in this case, Tristan, who has 2 lovely daughters, 10 and 5. They are his flesh and blood, and the light of his everyday. 

(So we have two people, who fell in love.. how romantic.. they have kids, how perfect! But wait? We forgot something. Yes, I am going to talk about this.. keep reading, it gets really good here!)

Then, people forget this part, there is a father to my two kids, who is my ex-husband. Who will always be my kids dad, no matter what they do, what he does, what I do or who I love.
Then surprise, there is a mother to Tristan's girls, who is Tristan's Ex-wife, who is the girls mother, and always will be. 

Are you following?

 So remember when you get married how hard it is to combine or "blend" your own traditions, your own ideas and thoughts? Imagine with me, for just a minute trying to combine, your children with the new siblings, the ideas of you and your new (husband), then throw on top of that the Ex's, as you are reading I am sure you are seeing how far from Blended, this Blended Family just might be!

Now wait, I know you are thinking, this sounds like a mess. Your right it is. But in this mess I cannot help but see opportunity. When Tristan and I got married, WE fell in love, not our kids. They did not have a choice, we are fortunate that they get along so well, like siblings really, from the beginning. We are lucky  to have this beautiful mess. I always know that in my life, when I meet a challenge, God never leaves me to handle it on my own. He presents me with new ideas, and new opportunities. I can absolutely say that I don't always have the answer, that when I am working in and with this blended family, at times, I am lost, I need help and, most of all I look to my partner (in crime, yes sometimes we want to run away.. that's normal). But we are always on the same page when it comes to this blended family. I have NEVER experienced that kind of unconditional support or balance, in a relationship, ever before.. AND I found that in this BLENDED family! 

This Blended Family, is blended in a way, that not one person could have created. We are not knit together, but we are blended in a way that is combined, while still showing the creativity and uniqueness of each family member. We are blended, so that we may operate as a unit, but still being reminded that each of us have challenges, we have parts to us, that cannot and will not be the same. But together we will work, to find the answers. Being a part of a blended family has its triumphs, it has its blunders. Like any family, the same struggles, but we choose to use them to unite us as one. 

I wouldn't change a thing. This family I am blessed to have. My husband, I cannot begin to tell you what an amazing man he is to me. The kids, they are my lights.

So, If I can leave you with something today, Be BLENDED. If you are a family unit, who is together with your children's spouse, remember to find your children's and your families, uniqueness. Don't get lost in the ideas of the perfect family, but strive to be different. If you are a new or Blended family unit, use your differences to create an amazing family, from what you have been given.Use your differences and your challenges, to make you who you are. Using your differences, to be amazing, and to be different in a way that people want to have what you have, they want that bond, that BLEND!

If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable - each segment distinct

 Letty Cottin Pogrebin 

BE BLENDED

Time keeps on ticking....ticking.... ticking....

For years and years I have been blogging professionally for my photography business, don't get me wrong, I love it, but when you blog for some many years about others, its becomes routine.

I needed a way to talk about things I love, share about my family, share about work, and about the blunders of the day to day, the great moments and the not-so-great moments in another forum. I needed a decompression part of my day, when it is quiet, when I can think, and that is not all about work!

So here I am blogging, blog number 1. The idea for this blog came after I read a post on one of my favorite tog sites, Photographers Connection.(https://www.facebook.com/PhotographersConnection) They asked, "What keeps you from blogging?" My response was time.

After I posted my response I sat and thought about it. That wasn't really the heart of my answer. I have time. Yes it is sparse, I am a full time photographer, running my own business, a wife, to the most amazing and big-hearted man, I WILL EVER MEET, (yes you should be jealous) mom to 4 amazing kids, Ethan 11, Kaylee 10, Allison 9 and Emily 5. The amount of girl power in this house, at times, is pretty much ridiculous. We also have two amazing dogs, Cocoa and Cupid, both Chihuahua's and well lets just say, we will have a lot to blog about with these two, and 3 amazing Beta Fish! 

Any normal person might see why I would write time. It seemed logical and safe, do you ever make answers like that? The ones that seem reasonable? Answers that only touch on the surface, perhaps hiding the real reason, because well it actually might make us think to much, or do more in a day or actually look into why or how we really feel this way? Well as I thought about it, I had the time, and I needed to make the time, because blogging when you love it, can be like therapy, only cheaper! My thoughts about my time, and how I needed to use it more effectively also came into play. The day after I responded to this post, I caught myself multitasking like crazy, and I knew I was selling myself short, by not making the time for a blog. A personal one. 

So three days later, after a few pieces of "borrowed Halloween candy," and a mind that can't stop thinking, here I am! My mind is racing with thoughts, possibilities and the opportunity that can come from this blog! My emphasis here, Make time, Make time for you, make time to be quiet, make time for yourself in this crazy day-to-day we call life.

“Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't

own it, but you can use it. You can't keep

it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it

you can never get it back.